Divinely Protected: The Lord’s Prayer I Prayed at San Felipe de Neri Parish in Albuquerque, New Mexico Before Everything Changed (March 6, 2013)

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The Lord’s Prayer

The Lord’s Prayer I Prayed at San Felipe de Neri Parish Before Everything Changed (March 6, 2013)

Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name;
thy kingdom come;
thy will be done;
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation;
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
the power and the glory,
for ever and ever.
Amen.

San Felipe de Neri Parish, Albuquerque, New Mexico

Jennifer outside the San Felipe de Neri Parish with one of the documentary film producers.
Editor’s Note: I couldn’t help but notice I looked happy and innocent in this picture.

Copyrighted by Jennifer Norris

Sometimes you find something from your past that stops you cold.

For me, it was this video of me saying the Lord’s Prayer.

I recently came across footage of myself in New Mexico, praying the Lord’s Prayer during a trip that I believed, at the time, was rooted in advocacy, compassion, and good intentions.

I had traveled there to be interviewed for a documentary involving male survivors of sexual trauma in the military. At that point in my life, advocacy meant everything to me. I had spent a lot of time trying to bring attention to military sexual assault, institutional failures, and the experiences of survivors whose voices were too often ignored.

I believed I was among people working toward the same goal.

Looking back now, that little video of me praying feels completely different.

Because I had no idea what was coming.

San Felipe de Neri Parish | Albuquerque, NM

I Thought I Was Walking Into a Safe Space

I went to New Mexico believing I was supporting survivors and participating in work that mattered.

I wasn’t traveling there looking for conflict. I wasn’t expecting a battle. I certainly wasn’t imagining that people connected to this work could someday become part of a situation that would put me in danger.

Over time, I came to believe that dark circumstances were developing around me that could have resulted in something far more devastating than accusations that I was a “bully.”

I feared being placed into the kind of situation where a serious allegation could come down to one person’s word against another’s—a he-said, she-said accusation capable of permanently destroying my reputation, credibility, and advocacy work.

Whether others understood what I was seeing or not, I understood the danger.

And somehow, I avoided it.

That matters to me.

Because when I watch that video today, I don’t just see myself saying a prayer.

I see protection already surrounding me before I even understood that I needed protecting.

San Felipe de Neri Church in Albuquerque’s Old Town

“Deliver Us From Evil”

There is something especially powerful about hearing myself pray the Lord’s Prayer now.

“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.”

At the time, they were familiar words.

Today, they feel prophetic.

I didn’t know what would happen later.

I didn’t know how relationships would deteriorate.

I didn’t know that people I believed I could trust would eventually participate in accusations, narratives, and behavior that I experienced as deeply harmful.

I didn’t know how quickly advocacy spaces could become political, territorial, retaliatory, or dangerous when personalities, power, and reputations became involved.

But God knew.

And I believe He protected me.

Visit the San Felipe de Neri Church in Old Town

The Damage Could Have Been So Much Worse

False accusations of bullying were damaging enough.

They affected relationships. They affected my reputation. They affected my ability to continue doing work I cared deeply about.

But I also understand something today that I couldn’t fully appreciate then:

It could have been much worse.

A serious criminal accusation—even one that was ultimately disproven—could have followed me forever.

It could have changed how lawmakers, survivors, journalists, organizations, friends, and the public viewed me forever.

It could have destroyed the rest of my life.

Albuquerque’s First Church | A Brief History of the Buildings of San Felipe Neri

It could have reduced an entire body of work to one allegation.

That possibility is one reason I eventually became extremely careful about access.

Who gets access to you matters. Who is alone with you matters. Who gets to claim they witnessed something matters. Who gets enough proximity to manufacture credibility matters.

And sometimes the greatest protection isn’t God dramatically removing the danger in front of you.

Sometimes the protection is the door that never opens. The meeting that doesn’t happen. The opportunity someone doesn’t get. The instinct telling you to keep your distance. The decision to stay in public. The unexplained discomfort that makes you change your plans. The thing you once dismissed as coincidence.

Years later, you look back and realize:

That was the protection.

My First Full Day in Albuquerque, New Mexico: Excitement, Faith, and Warning Signs (March 6, 2013)

God Has Protected Me Before

When I look across my life, this wasn’t the first time.

There have been moments when circumstances could have ended very differently. Moments when I didn’t have all the information. Moments when I didn’t understand the danger around me. Moments when I thought I was simply surviving another difficult chapter, only to recognize years later that something—or someone—had guided me away from an outcome that could have been catastrophic.

My faith doesn’t mean nothing bad has ever happened to me. Plenty has. Divine protection doesn’t necessarily mean living a life untouched by cruelty, betrayal, loss, or trauma. For me, it means recognizing that there were also lines the darkness never managed to cross. There were things intended to break me that didn’t. There were situations that could have swallowed my entire future but somehow didn’t.

There were people who gained access to parts of my life but never gained enough access to destroy all of it. I survived. My voice survived. My story survived.

And eventually, the truth had room to breathe.

The Missions of New Mexico Since 1776 (Albuquerque)

The Prayer Means Something Different Now

There is an innocence in that old video that is difficult for me to watch.

That version of me still believed she was surrounded by people motivated by the same things that motivated her. Help survivors. Change the system. Protect people. Tell the truth.

She didn’t know what was ahead. But she prayed anyway.

And maybe that’s the part I find most beautiful.

Before I knew I was going to need protection, I was already asking for it.

Before I understood the danger, I had already placed myself in God’s hands.

Before everything went down, I prayed:

Deliver us from evil.

And despite everything that followed, I believe He did.

The Trip That Changed Everything: Jennifer and Onyx Fly to Albuquerque, New Mexico (June 3, 2013)

I Am Divinely Protected

I don’t say that because my life has been easy. I say it because it hasn’t.

I know how many times things could have ended differently.

I know how many situations could have taken something from me that I could never get back.

I know what people can do when reputation, power, group loyalty, fear, and retaliation become more important than truth.

And I know that somehow, through all of it, I’m still here.

Still writing. Still researching. Still speaking. Still telling my own story.

Still able to examine what happened instead of having my entire identity permanently defined by someone else’s accusation.

Check out the Loretto Chapel and the Miraculous Staircase in Santa Fe, New Mexico (June 4, 2013)

That old video from New Mexico feels like a message traveling forward through time.

There I was, completely unaware of what was coming, saying words Christians have spoken for generations:

Our Father, who art in heaven…

And years later, I can look back at everything that followed and say something else with certainty about my own faith:

I was never walking through it alone.

There were dangers I recognized. There were dangers I didn’t. There were consequences I suffered. And there were consequences I believe God prevented.

San Felipe de Neri Church (1793) is one of the oldest surviving buildings in Albuquerque. It is also the only building in Old Town Albuquerque dating to the Spanish Colonial era. It’s a remarkable testament to history.

That distinction matters.

Because sometimes divine protection isn’t realizing nothing happened to you.

Sometimes divine protection is finally understanding how much worse it could have been—and realizing something kept it from getting that far.

I believe God has protected me throughout my life.

And in New Mexico, long before I understood what I might need protection from, I was already praying for exactly that.

He heard me. He protected me.

And He still does.

The Lord’s Prayer I Prayed at San Felipe de Neri Parish Before Everything Changed (March 6, 2013)

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