Jennifer and Lee

Christine Hassing Published ‘Jennifer and Onyx’ in the Hope Has a Cold Nose Book (February 17, 2019)

For National Service Dog Day, a tribute to the dog who helped me feel safe enough to live again.

By Jen Norris

Onyx turned 14 this month. She is still here with me, healthy and thriving. Sometimes I look at her and think about everything we have lived through together. I wish I could tell her, in words she would understand, just how much of my life I owe to her.

Lee and I have always loved each other. But there was a time when we were both struggling so deeply with our own injuries and pain that neither of us could pull the other out. We needed help, and love alone could not make us well. After a lifetime of abuse and betrayal, I had learned to expect danger. I was exhausted from trying to protect myself.

Then Onyx came into my life.

One Reasonable Boundary, Two Angry Strangers, an Internet Beatdown, and the Smear Campaign That Upended My Advocacy Efforts (June 6, 2013)

In an earlier piece about the healing power of animals, I wrote about how she brought routine back to my days. She needed food, walks, play, and time with me. Caring for her gave me reasons to get up and keep going. As I learned to trust that she had my back, I began to feel something I had nearly lost: safety.

That mattered when I encountered people whose behavior frightened me. Onyx stayed close, helped me hold my ground, and gave me the confidence to keep my distance. She protected me at a time when I needed protection. Lee and I both believe that she saved my life. I believe she was part of the divine protection that carried me through those years.

Her gift was also in what she did on ordinary days. She stayed with me when I felt isolated. She met me with love when I had little left to give myself. She made it possible to take one small step, then another, until I could begin to find my feet again.

A Quiet Lifeline: How Onyx Helped Us Survive Relentless Online Bullying; Jennifer, Lee and Onyx Go For a Jeep Ride in Western Maine (August 10, 2013)

In the story Christine Hassing wrote about us, I described how Onyx helped me leave the place where I had hidden from the world. When I needed to retreat, she came with me. When I was ready to go out again, she came then, too. She helped me return to the outdoors, to other people, and to parts of myself I feared were gone.

I remember taking Onyx camping in the White Mountain National Forest. On a narrow, rocky trail, she could not always walk beside me, so she kept her head against my leg instead. At the campground, I could go exploring on my own because I knew she was with me. Those may sound like small things. To someone who had been afraid to leave home alone, they were freedom.

Onyx did not erase what happened to me. She loved me while I found my way through it. That love opened something inside me. The more she cared for me, the more I wanted to care for her. She made me feel that I mattered, and she gave me someone precious to come home to.

15 Ways My K9s for Warriors Service Dog Has Helped Me (October 15, 2015)

For so long, my mission had been serving everyone else. As I wrote in my reflection on K9s for Warriors, Onyx helped me turn some of that care toward myself. She helped me understand that my life was worth caring for, too.

In 2019, we adopted her sister Chinook. Chinook became Lee’s service dog, and she is every bit as remarkable in her own way. Today, both girls are retired. We no longer use them in public settings. At home, they still give us love, comfort, support, and warmth every damn day—especially on the days when those things matter most.

Now it is our turn to look after them through their older years. We have a wonderful veterinarian helping our dogs age with comfort and care. We will do whatever Onyx and Chinook need. After all they have given us, there is no question about that.

The Power of Service Dogs: Navigating PTSD with Onyx (March 10, 2014)

National Service Dog Day is a chance to honor the work these dogs do. For me, it is also a chance to honor who Onyx is. She is my companion, my protector, and one of the great loves of my life. Fourteen years old, still beside me, still making our home feel warmer.

Onyx, you helped me feel safe. You helped me get back on my feet. You gave me your trust and your whole heart, day after day. Lee and I love you and Chinook more than we can say. We will spend every day we have making sure you feel that love in return.

K9s for Warriors is Making a Difference (August 2, 2015)

Related articles and sources

From Jennifer and Lee, in order of the publication dates shown on the site:

1. June 3, 2013 — The Trip That Changed Everything: Jennifer and Onyx Fly to Albuquerque, New Mexico
2. August 10, 2013 — A Quiet Lifeline: How Onyx Helped Us Survive Relentless Online Bullying
3. March 10, 2014 — The Power of Service Dogs: Navigating PTSD with Onyx
4. April 22, 2014 — The Healing Power of Animals for Troops with PTSD
5. May 30, 2014 — Our Dream Beach Trip on the Florida Coast
6. June 4, 2014 — Equine Therapy for Veterans: A Gentle Respect
7. June 22, 2014 — Camping with Onyx in the White Mountain National Forest
8. August 2, 2015 — K9s for Warriors is Making a Difference
9. September 21, 2015 — An Open Letter to All Airlines Regarding Service Dogs
10. October 15, 2015 — 15 Ways My K9s for Warriors Service Dog Has Helped Me
11. October 18, 2015 — Dempsey Challenge 5K in Honor of My Late Father William R. Stowell
12. February 17, 2019 — Christine Hassing Published “Jennifer and Onyx” | Our Story of Triumph & Hope After Military Sexual Trauma