“I Just Want to Disappear”: The End Result of a Lifetime of Dehumanization and Abuse “I just want to disappear” are the last words I said to medical personnel and those same words would end my Air Force career for good. I’m not exactly sure where to start as I’ve never put words to any … More The Desire to Not Exist is Not the Same As Wanting to Die (2025)
Prior to treatment this is what the abuse of parents, school bullies, criminals one is trapped with, toxic military leaders, an abusive ex-wife, crooked cops, & finally toxic “veteran advocates” who prioritized popularity over people’s lives did to us. It beat our souls down and gave us chronic illness. Now we are well enough to … More Abusers Think They Control Fate… But It Just Makes Their Hands Messier & Even More Traceable (2024)
“Sometimes God will put the Goliath in your life to find the David within you” – Unknown “I, Jennifer, entered this life vowing to fulfill two things; that I would serve and that I would lead. Like the missions I promised to give my all to, to the death if need be, my soul also … More Christine Hassing Published ‘Jennifer and Onyx’ | Our Story of Triumph & Hope After Military Sexual Trauma (February 17, 2019)
My HealtheVet was created to help address some of the communication issues veterans had with medical providers at the Department of Veterans Affairs and is a wonderful program. We love it. When it was first created, we were finally able to easily have conversations with our medical providers and get medical clearance forms signed by … More VA Maine Healthcare System ROI Office Takes a Step Back in Time and Rural Vets Take the Hit
My husband and I participated in our second 5K this spring. The first one we did was last fall for the Dempsey Center who raises awareness and funds for those who have cancer, a deadly disease most of us have come in contact with at some point in our lives. I chose to do the Dempsey … More Teal Ribbon 5K for Sexual Assault Awareness Month (2016)
I’ve done a lot of firsts this past couple years and I added one more to the list this past week. I went sailing for the first time ever and even took the helm of the sailboat for quite a ways. What went from being completely uninterested in pursuing this particular hobby in the future … More Sailboating in Tampa Bay with the St. Petersburg Sailing Center in Florida (2016)
The first time I ever heard the term military sexual trauma was when I was living with my future husband in Olympia, Washington in 2006. He was active duty Air Force stationed at McChord Air Force Base. I was a traditional National Guardsman. I had just transferred from a combat communications squadron in 2005 to a … More Paying It Forward Thanks to Army Specialist Suzanne Swift (2016)
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: a condition of persistent mental and emotional stress occurring as a result of injury or severe psychological shock, typically involving disturbance of sleep and constant vivid recall of the experience, with dulled responses to others and to the outside world. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) has baffled my mind since first … More Coping with Complex PTSD: A Veteran’s Perspective (2016)
This eat clean grocery list was provided by EXOS. Protein (with each meal/snack) Fish Shellfish Tuna (in water) Chicken breast (skinless) Chicken breast (deli) Ground chicken Turkey breast Turkey breast (deli) Ground turkey Steak Lean roast beef (deli) Lean ham (deli) Ground beef Pork tenderloin/chop Omega-3 Eggs Hard-boiled omega-3 eggs Egg whites Skim/1% milk Skim/1% … More The Ideal Grocery List for High Octane Fuel
I used to wonder why it took so much energy just to exist in normal society. I just assumed that it was something I had to accept, another limitation of Post Traumatic Stress. I now understand the neuroscience behind what happens to our bodies when we get stuck in fight or flight. Everything makes more … More My Body was Stuck in Fight or Flight
Jennifer and Lee 